Do you know what the worst part of divorce is? It’s not over when you sign the dotted line.
In place of court dates, you’ll be dealing with child custody arrangements, alimony payments, and the horrors of a joint Netflix account.
Moving on is hard, and the best thing you can do to smooth the transition is to address you and your ex’s concerns as fairly and as early as possible.
No. And that’s the long answer.
Across the country, courts have ruled that motorized beer coolers, parade floats and zambonis are treated exactly the same as their 4-wheeled counterparts. Let’s take a look at a few real-world examples.
Showboating Buffoonery
If you’re injured by someone who was operating a vehicle under the influence of alcohol or drugs, there’s a good chance 10/12 jurors will be ready to rule in your favor before the opening statements even begin.
We’ve written about divorced couples that amicably split millions of dollars, presidential mansions, and in one case a Nobel Prize. But adding a family pet to the mix turns even the classiest divorce into Jerry Springer meets Cesar Millan.
Dogs, cats, and whatever else Paris Hilton dangles from her rhinestone leashes nowadays, they are not living, breathing creatures with affections and emotions.
What’s the weirdest personal injury case you can think of?
The infamous McDonald's coffee-spill is usually at the top of most people’s “frivolous lawsuits” list (nevermind that the facts of that case are often misunderstood).
And a quick Google search turns up countless reports of a burglar who sued his victim after getting stuck in the garage for over a week, but that legal legend is a total fabrication.
Going to court is about as fun as an afternoon pigeon racing with Mike Tyson. Sadly, that isn’t a bizarre metaphor we made up just for this article. No, it’s a real hobby of the former heavyweight champion, and much like divorce court, once the conversation turns toward “the longest duration on record,” you know you’re in trouble.
In 2005, the US Department of Justice estimated that 8,527 motor vehicle accident cases involving personal injuries went to trial.
That’s back when Brad and Jennifer were still married! Alas, the DoJ isn’t great at updating its numbers but we’ve got a point to make, so bear with us.
Hugh Hefner was a controversial figure for most of his life. He donated millions to charitable campaigns...but also created a reality TV show about dating three models simultaneously whose ages added together were still lower than his own.
As the founder of the most famous adult entertainment business in history, you might expect the Playboy creator to be well acquainted with scurrilous run-ins with family law.
Every discussion of liability lawsuits eventually arrives at the same conclusion: personal injury lawyers are evil.
They’re either representing multinational conglomerates to squash worker/customer protections, or filing frivolous lawsuits over spilt coffee.
We’ve been covering celebrity divorce and personal injury cases for almost a year now. We started this blog partly to work through our rejected Law & Order auditions, but mostly to reach new clients.
Our hope is that cracking jokes about whomever Justin Bieber is courting and/or running over with his truck will make hiring an attorney a little less intimidating for Seattle-area residents.
As personal injury lawyers, we’ve used this blog to dissect everything from celebrity motorcycle accidents to komodo dragon bites, which leaves only one topic left to cover: suing children.
That may seem “heartless,” but if someone hurts you, and you did nothing to deserve it, you should be compensated.