The world has already recovered from the demise of the seemingly indestructible Brangelina. Now, we pin our marriage hopes on the enduring union of Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively. We watch with bated breath as Will and Jada continue to carry the torch of matrimony.
Based on recent statistics, nearly one-third of all women in the US have experienced domestic violence. So if you can help it, please refrain from using risqué material pertaining to domestic abuse for your comedy act or bar’s slogan. Don’t even make a reference to one of pop culture’s most infamous cases when guest-rapping on your wife’s hit single.
We’re wrapping up one heck of a year. A reality TV show host was sworn in as President of the United States, some important British guy got engaged to a Yankee, and people finally noticed that Google’s cheeseburger placed the cheese under the patty.
It turns out that some of our readers are interested in more substantive posts than ones about celebrity courtroom drama.
We know this because our posts are still outranked on Google by AllLaw.com, which is a tad frustrating since theirs provide bland, unspecific explanations (and zero toilet humor).
For example, take their article entitled: What You Must Prove to Win a Slip and Fall Injury Claim.
Do you know what the worst part of divorce is? It’s not over when you sign the dotted line.
In place of court dates, you’ll be dealing with child custody arrangements, alimony payments, and the horrors of a joint Netflix account.
Moving on is hard, and the best thing you can do to smooth the transition is to address you and your ex’s concerns as fairly and as early as possible.
No. And that’s the long answer.
Across the country, courts have ruled that motorized beer coolers, parade floats and zambonis are treated exactly the same as their 4-wheeled counterparts. Let’s take a look at a few real-world examples.
Showboating Buffoonery
If you’re injured by someone who was operating a vehicle under the influence of alcohol or drugs, there’s a good chance 10/12 jurors will be ready to rule in your favor before the opening statements even begin.
We’ve written about divorced couples that amicably split millions of dollars, presidential mansions, and in one case a Nobel Prize. But adding a family pet to the mix turns even the classiest divorce into Jerry Springer meets Cesar Millan.
Dogs, cats, and whatever else Paris Hilton dangles from her rhinestone leashes nowadays, they are not living, breathing creatures with affections and emotions.
What’s the weirdest personal injury case you can think of?
The infamous McDonald's coffee-spill is usually at the top of most people’s “frivolous lawsuits” list (nevermind that the facts of that case are often misunderstood).
And a quick Google search turns up countless reports of a burglar who sued his victim after getting stuck in the garage for over a week, but that legal legend is a total fabrication.
Going to court is about as fun as an afternoon pigeon racing with Mike Tyson. Sadly, that isn’t a bizarre metaphor we made up just for this article. No, it’s a real hobby of the former heavyweight champion, and much like divorce court, once the conversation turns toward “the longest duration on record,” you know you’re in trouble.
In 2005, the US Department of Justice estimated that 8,527 motor vehicle accident cases involving personal injuries went to trial.
That’s back when Brad and Jennifer were still married! Alas, the DoJ isn’t great at updating its numbers but we’ve got a point to make, so bear with us.