When two writers become a couple, certain things are almost guaranteed: a happy family of wordsmiths, a house lined with bookshelves, or — in the event of a split — a divorce conducted entirely on the battlefield of prose. And when that split happens, there’s a good chance both exes will gleefully turn their pens on each other.
So, what happens when two authors who once shared a marriage end up divorced and now weaponize their books against each other? We end up with dueling memoirs and several recommendations for your next read. But before we get to the literature, let’s talk about the authors/exes behind all of it.
One divorce, two authors, several books
Writing about a failed marriage, whether as a tell-all memoir or a cleverly disguised novel, is one of the most efficient ways to turn the lemons of divorce into lemonade. Hannah Pittard and Andrew Ewell, both writers and former spouses, wasted no time doing just that. Their marriage may have crumbled, but their shared talent for monetizing the wreckage is undeniable. It would almost be inspiring if it weren’t also so…devious.
Here’s how things unfolded.
In 2016, Pittard discovered her husband’s affair with her best friend. Divorce followed, and so did her memoir, We Are Too Many: A Memoir [Kind Of], a tale of betrayal, heartbreak, and the kind of epiphanies that make publishers salivate. According to Ewell, the book contains details that don’t quite align with his version of events. We haven’t fact-checked it (yet), but we’re tempted to pick up a copy for research purposes.
One can imagine the emotional whiplash of reliving the implosion of your marriage on the page. But surely there’s a unique satisfaction in seeing your story displayed on the shelves at Barnes & Noble. In a less chaotic world, the saga might have ended with the publication of Pittard’s memoir. But we don’t live in that world.
Also unwilling to leave good material on the table, Ewell penned Set for Life, a satirical novel told from the perspective of an aspiring writer who betrayed his wife. In it, the fictional wife writes her own autofictional account of their marriage and divorce, a neat little literary hall of mirrors that conveniently gave Ewell the last word. Or so he thought.
Naturally, Pittard didn’t take that lying down. She responded with If You Love It, Let It Kill You, a novel about — wait for it — her ex-husband writing a novel that portrays her in an unflattering light. The book spares few real-world details, including the infamous best-friend affair.
Victim, villain, or just co-authors of chaos?
One could argue that Pittard and Ewell’s books are less stand-alone works and more an ongoing conversation: one chapter written in memoir, the next in satire. Pittard’s If You Love It… even has its narrator pause to consider the ethics of turning a shared relationship into raw material.
At first glance, it seems obvious who deserves our sympathies. Pittard was betrayed by both her husband and her best friend, only to see that same betrayal recycled for literary profit. But she also got there first, publishing her account of their marriage without looping him in (not that she needed to). And really, who’s to say Ewell wouldn’t have done the same eventually? In this particular genre, timing is everything.
When your ex is your muse
We could sit here and debate which of the two wrote the “better” book or who had the right to write about it. But frankly, we don’t feel like it. What fascinates us more, as family lawyers, is how each of them may have discussed these projects with their attorneys. Did they ask about possible defamation claims? Did anyone draft disclaimers in advance? And, most importantly, will a film studio scoop up the rights so we can all buy popcorn and watch?
The legal reality is that unlike custody, property, or support, courts don’t award anyone exclusive rights to “the story” of a marriage. As long as neither party publishes outright lies or engages in malicious character assassination for profit, they’re generally free to write as many tell-alls or thinly veiled novels as their publishers can stomach.
In other words, this literary sparring match is more forgivable than it is actionable — provided the names are changed, the identifying details are altered, and no children are caught in the crossfire.
Related reading: Marriage, divorce, and custody troubles according to Fleishman Is in Trouble
We’re writers too…of legal drafts
If you happen to be going through a divorce here in the Evergreen State, we’re the ones you want drafting the paperwork. Think of us as the editors who make sure your divorce is written the way it should be — no plot holes, no loose ends. (Yes, it’s an awful metaphor, but we’ll allow it.)
Call our offices when you need experienced legal representation for your divorce in Washington State.