We imagine that in 2016, when Katy Perry and Orlando Bloom first met at a Golden Globes afterparty, there were fireworks. They became a couple soon after, and by 2025, you’d be forgiven for thinking they’d tied the knot. But they hadn’t. And now, they’ve separated.
Normally, we wouldn’t give celebrity breakups this much space unless it involved unforgettable, bizarre Instagram divorce announcements or a legal battle as drawn out as a geopolitical war.
Ms. Firework and Legolas may not have divorced, but with the amount of press their split has gotten, they might as well have. Here are our best guesses as to why.
For any pop star, breakups are as high-stakes as a “Firework”
When news of their split broke, Katy was in the middle of her fairly successful Lifetimes Tour, which gained substantial attention from both the press and fans. The reviews were mixed at best, with some saying it "isn't as awful as the internet makes it out to be," and others flat-out labeling it "so cringe." Clearly, critics and Katy Kats (her fanbase) were torn.
Another thing the general public couldn’t quite agree on was how they felt about Katy being on tour during a breakup.
One camp feels Katy is getting unfairly maligned and deserves some grace. After all, this is her second time navigating a breakup while on a concert tour. Sure, she has millions of adoring fans, but imagine performing soaring pop anthems to stadiums full of people while dealing with the weight of a breakup. Not many people can relate to parting with your fiancé while touring the globe, but it’s nevertheless hard not to sympathize with her situation.
At least, Katy gains some sympathy from the general public who may have turned on her after her critically panned singles and album. Her trip to space, with an all-female crew, didn’t exactly endear her to the masses, either. And in America, female pop stars might be acquitted of producing subpar art, but hopping on a billionaire’s rocket and describing the experience as “second only to being a mom” is a much harder sin to forgive.
They have a child, and Katy’s not going to cry over Orlando becoming the one that got away (from baby daddy duties)
They have a daughter, Daisy, and Orlando has a son, Flynn, whom he shares with his ex Miranda Kerr. While people are likely not as invested in their domestic life, some segments of the general public are curious as to how they plan to handle co-parenting. Because we are neither their attorney nor their publicist, all we could tell at this point is that the two intend to co-parent amicably because their representatives have stated that they’re shifting their focus toward becoming co-parents.
Our legal crystal ball tells us these two wealthy A-listers won’t be duking it out in court to argue over who should pay for little Daisy’s piano lessons. We don’t see them fighting about who deserves more custody time: the pop star mommy or the Hollywood daddy. Child visitation probably won’t be an issue. Probably.
They’re closely associated with the Bezoses
Like most celebrity divorces, Katy and Orlando’s split grabbed the public’s attention because:
- They’re big stars, and
- Orlando allegedly cheated on Katy.
We’re not here to learn the truth, but after some deep-dive into several think-pieces, it seems their breakup had more to do with Katy’s poorly received new album and her little trip to space, which Orlando reportedly found embarrassing.
They’re also close friends with the Bezoses, which ties into Katy’s historic, Bezos-funded flight to outer space. This explains why the news of their split made a splash, unlike Katy’s recent musical output.
Does being pals with one of the richest men on the planet automatically make you a media target? Not exactly. But Katy and Orlando’s close ties with Jeff Bezos and his new wife, Lauren Sanchez, certainly put them in the spotlight.
Orlando even attended Bezos and Lauren’s destination wedding in Venice. Maybe the exes got a first-row seat to the details of Bezos’s own divorce and thought, “Yeah, let’s avoid all that.” Which might explain why, after years of engagement, they ended up as ex-fiancés instead.
In conclusion, don’t cry for Katy
Katy Perry might be “losing” in some ways here, with some people lamenting that she’s about to become a single mother. That she will be, but unlike many single mothers, Katy’s net worth is around $350 million, and it’ll likely grow after her tour wraps up. She’ll be just fine.
In the end, Katy still has something to smile about: she isn’t getting divorced, which means she won’t have to part with a huge chunk of her millions (Orlando’s net worth is, let’s say, notably lower). She might even end up producing the best album of her career.
As the lyrics of a Katy Perry song go:
Just because it's over doesn't mean it's really over,
And if I think it over, maybe you’ll be coming over again,
And I'll have to get over you all over again.
She might as well be referencing divorce here. But we think not. Speaking of divorce, if you need an attorney, we’re the team to call in Washington State. Just leave us a message.