Not everyone knows the highs and lows of moving into a post-divorce apartment. Some people get the marital home in the split, while others face the daunting task of fitting their new life into four walls that feel entirely alienating. If you've found yourself unpacking boxes in that post-divorce apartment, you know the excitement of freedom mixed with the unease of realizing that this new space is a stranger to you.
Family law attorneys like us aren’t typically called upon for interior design or apartment-hunting advice. But we’ll take a swing at answering this question anyway: Should you stay in your post-divorce apartment?
What is a post-divorce apartment?
A post-divorce apartment is a place you move into after the dust settles, the papers are signed, and the emotional whiplash of separating from one’s spouse starts to fade. It’s your own space, free of the chaos of a joint mortgage yet weirdly filled with your memories of independence and more unpacked boxes than you’ll ever know what to do with. The goal here isn’t nostalgia for your ex, but a fresh start. But how fresh is it really?
“Fresh start” is a phrase thrown around like it’s a magical cure for post-divorce sadness. You’ll hear it from your friends, your mom, your therapist, and probably the nice stranger who tried to help you with your moving boxes. But sometimes, a fresh start isn’t just a platitude.
For some people, moving into a new place can be a great psychological reset. Get out of the emotional footprint of your old life, and in doing so, you may start feeling like you’ve really left it all behind. You can even pick a neighborhood that gives you a clean slate, preferably one where you don’t run into your ex.
After a certain period, however, you may start to wonder if it makes sense to stay in your post-divorce apartment after the rush of that fresh start has started to wear off.
The financial realities
Many people stay in their post-divorce apartment out of sentimental reasons — comfort, familiarity, or maybe even some version of denial. But remember: this place isn't your therapist.
Staying in your post-divorce apartment may make sense if your financial situation allows it, but don't forget about the realities of responsibility. There are potential pitfalls you didn’t see coming, such as being stuck with a lease you can’t afford alone.
When staying makes perfect sense
In some cases, staying can actually be the most practical option. Consider the following scenarios:
- Proximity to your kids’ school (if you have kids) – If the apartment is close enough to their school, your kids may prefer the stability of staying put — no one wants to break the “new routine” yet again.
- Rent-controlled apartments – If you're lucky enough to have one of those mythical beasts, don’t be too quick to let it go. Let’s face it, rents aren’t getting any cheaper.
- Solid financial footing — If you can afford it, and staying doesn't cause unnecessary stress, then it's the rational thing to do.
Staying makes sense only if it’s a choice, not a crutch. Moving on is about freedom, not just a matter of convenience or fear of change.
Related reading: Family law attorneys weigh in: Is it okay to be annoyed when your ex becomes wealthy
Stay or go, but do it like a grown-up
When it comes to staying or leaving your post-divorce apartment, there’s no one-size-fits-all solution. What matters most is making the decision that’s right for you, not driven by guilt, nostalgia, or fear of change, but based on what fits your needs and your wallet.
If you’re staying because it’s a logical decision — i.e., to keep your kids in the same school district, or you've found a financial footing that makes it work — then by all means, settle in and enjoy the closet space you have all to yourself. But if you're staying just because it feels safer or easier to avoid change, you might want to rethink that.
The real failure here? Not calling your lawyer when you need advice, especially about the things that matter most to your future.
So, if you're wrestling with post-divorce real estate dilemmas, LaGrandeur & Williams is ready to help. Call us or leave us a message.